One of my friends has a favorite expression for when she's ready to stop talking about something -- "Moving on!" It can be frustrating to hear that when you want to keep talking, and yet profoundly useful, too. We could keep getting upset about something we can't (or are unwilling to) change. Or we can move on. Maybe that's true about our mistakes, too. There were too many mistakes in the past to carry them all into the future. Let's move on. -- doug smith
There have been times when I was teaching a program called "Communicating With Tact and Diplomacy" when one or more of the participants would tell me "this is my last chance -- HR sent me here to fix me or I'm gone..." How's that for a challenge? Get fixed or get gone. I very often tell people that I can't fix anyone because people are not broken in places I know how to fix. But, that's not a great thing to say to someone who has their working life on the line. It might sound diplomatic, but it is not helpful, and maybe not entirely true. Entirely true? What even does that mean? Isn't something true or NOT? The point is, we do not need to fix anyone in order to help them fix the way they perform. In my classes I do sometimes help people become more diplomatic -- but that is a start, not an end destination. There is something better than diplomacy and that is compassionate truth. It's harder, it takes more time, it's often easily misunders